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Sunday 15th Nov

Where does 1 even begin? In her i had a best friend, a mother, a colleague, and everything else that i just cannot put into words. I dreamed about her a few days before she passed, in the dream i was crying because i was delighted to see her back at work and well. She was probably thinking of me too, maybe even hoping to see me for the last time so she could say her goodbyes. Sometimes i feel like it’s a good thing i never got to see her lying helplessly in bed not knowing when she’d be taking her last breath. But at times i cannot help but wonder if she knew just how much i loved and cared about her.

Death took a lot of people i cared about before, but Hellen was special. She was friends with everyone at the office. Everyone ran to her when they needed a shoulder to lean on, because they knew that with her their secrets were safe. She was a true friend! I can’t find the right words to describe the pain I felt when i heard the news, worst of all I had to show up for work the following day. How do you walk into an office and just carry on with work as if everything is alright when it isn’t? It was the weirdest most painful day of my life, I never wanna feel that way ever again! Pain so deep and so heavy to carry around.

To Hellen: We love you Mokgotsi, Mother and for as long as we shall live you’ll always be in our hearts and dreams!!

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